Friday, 27 July 2012

Research project: did you go to the Fattylympics?

The Fat Geography Massive (aka Bethan and Rachel) were the people organising the Gym Knicker Blinging stall. They are also researchers who do work on fat activism, and are doing some research on the Fattylympics, with Kay's and my support.

They are looking for people to give accounts of the event to help document the activism and community organisation that took place so that it can inform future fat activism and can help develop academic work on the creation of size acceptance spaces.

If you would be happy to be involved in this research, please email them at fatgeographymassive@gmail.com and they will send you more information - if you email them you can still decide not to take part after you've got the information, they promise they won't spam you.

Tuesday, 10 July 2012

Egg'n'Spoon fan page

Click and join.

This is what it looked like



























Thanks to Simon, Corinna, Tam and Dansette for pics. Please get in touch if you're in a picture and want it taken down.

Monday, 9 July 2012

This is what we did

Thank you to everyone who showed up and made Saturday such a beautiful and memorable and inspiring day. About 150 Fattylympians took part, rolling, spitting, spinning, and twirling.

It's hard to choose favourite moments, I just have a feeling of joy and hope about the whole thing. When I think about the day I have images of amazing beauty and loveliness in my mind. Ribbons twirling up into the sky, people singing the Anthem together, Erkan being funny and lovely, folks rolling down the hill, giggling, friends, good conversations, new people, naughty behaviour, medals, dancing, silliness, music and noise, and smiling happy people everywhere. People really really loved it and it showed.

Mostly it was an afternoon of being together, and community and politics that make you feel alive rather than shut down. I think one of the reasons for doing the Fattylympics was to create an alternative narrative that people could draw on, something that deflates the power of the official version, which is due to be rammed down our throats in a couple of weeks. I think we did that. It was so wonderful to see all kinds of people taking on the fat stuff, actively taking a stand against fat hatred, and making sense of it in their own way. I feel really proud about that.

I've been thinking about the Fattylympics on and off since 2005, when London was named as 2012 host. But as the years have passed and the reality of what the Olympics means to East London has become more apparent, the naivety of my original plan has been exposed. I haven't been able to talk about this before now because I was afraid that it would get the Fattylympics closed down. Now that the event has passed, I can be more frank.

We funded the Fattylympics ourselves through a Jumble sale. We wanted the event to be free from the outset, but it turned out that we couldn't have had the freedom to do what we did if we had sought other forms of funding. Our independence turned out to be important.

We couldn't go through the usual publicity channels. This was a big challenge. People who wanted to help were keen to go to the media, but they didn't understand the delicate situation in East London. People go a bit silly when offered media coverage, they become naive and fail to fully comprehend the extent to which mainstream media hates fat and queer people, has no interest in representing people fairly, and is more than happy to stir up Olympics shit.

LOCOG have been extremely litigious against anyone they see as infringing the intellectual property of the Games, which they want to reserve for the corporate giants who have bought the rights to use Olympics symbols. By litigious, I mean things as petty as forcing the hotel next door to paste a piece of paper over a torch illustration on their sign, closing down and threatening local companies for using copyrighted words and symbols, and there are various laws in place to repress free speech and protest (define protest how you will) about the Olympics that are being enforced, Kevin Blowe has a good list. The intrusion feels very personal and frightening. On top of this, policing in Stratford is extremely heavy at the moment, with many stop and searches going on, some anti-terrorist raids, and the on-going criminalisation of black and Asian youth. See the Newham Monitoring Project for more about that. Furthermore, there is a surge in private security contracting and the area is being militarised, with surface-to-air missiles stationed on the tower of a gated community in Bow. This is all in a context of repressive policing following last years summer riots and the upswing in public protest thanks to a government that hates the poor and loves the rich (not to mention a baseline rhetoric of nationalism and winning at all costs).

We had realistic fears that we would be closed down if LOCOG, the police, or the council got wind of us. We would have been able to get some mileage out of their suppression of peaceful protest, and the fact that we framed the Fattylympics as a satire, but we didn't want any trouble at all. This meant that we couldn't risk using mainstream media for publicity.

For the most part this was fine. The Fattylympics was a weird event that fused fat activism and anti-Olympics protest using prankishness and buffoonery. Fat activism is completely unknown to most people, it's regarded as little more than a joke, which is annoying but which also enables us to do things fairly unnoticed. Who'd believe that a bunch of fatties could do anything radical?

Closer to the day things started to change. A woman from "the Chinese equivalent of the BBC" pestered me and Kay, and threatened to turn up on the day with a film crew, whilst implying that we would be stupid to turn down this wonderful opportunity (Louise Beaumont of Blakeway Productions Ltd, a Ten Alps company, you are truly a piece of work). The Telegraph lifted quotes from the blog without warning or permission and published a snotty article. They ignored the notice to journalists to leave us alone. Once that was out more media started to harass us. We began to worry that photographers would come and take headless fatty pictures to sell to photo agencies. It was and is important to us that we make the Fattylympics a happy space where people could mess about without interference, especially given that fat people take a lot of shit for just daring to exist. We worried that we would not be able to do this, and made plans in case we had to stop everything.

Ultimately reporter Jill Foster and photographer Mike Lawn, who sold their work to The Daily Mail, came and sneaked around like cowards, and published a sarcastic story and pictures of people without their consent. Their report is plainly stupid but it is upsetting to know that they were there with their own unethical and silent agenda built on the backs of people's openness and trust. This is abusive. If people want to make a case through the Press Complaints Commission, or contact the National Union of Journalists (they may be members), we will support you.

Kay and I took steps to question people taking photographs, we asked people to be vigilant, but there was no way we could police the whole event, and we did not want to create an atmosphere of suspicion. In any case, Jill Foster and Mike Lawn would probably have lied or been evasive had we confronted them. As the Leveson enquiry has shown, they work for companies that will do anything to get a story, and I don't know what else we could have done to eject them. Perhaps we could have warned people more? I don't know. I sincerely apologise to anyone whose picture turned up in the Daily Mail, I'm sorry that we could not keep you safe.

So these were the pressures under which we produced this event. The Fattylympics took a lot of work to pull together because we had to make it very personal and go through friends and networks. We struggled because, by a twist of fate that emerged too late for us to change the date, it took place on the same day as Pride and meant that we could not rely on people in the queer community to show up. We approached but were fairly ignored by arts communities in East London, who didn't get what we were doing at all. The anti-Olympics movement here is suffering from the effects of heavy-handed policing. It took a bit of work to show that we were sincere, though there were still people who didn't get it and treated us like a joke. I mean, we are a joke, we are pranksters, but we are also protesters, and we have politics. Even then, people's fatphobia and possibly their homophobia meant that we could not rely on those networks to support us, though they wanted us to support them!

By work I mean working evenings and weekends to tell people about the event, constant emailing, writing for the blog, making things, encouraging people to get involved, wrangling volunteers, the space, the stalls, the events, the food, various people, problems, annoyances and so on. It took about six months to pull together, and a couple of years before that to talk through what we wanted to do. When people say to us: "You must do another one!" or "Come to our town and do one there!" they are ignoring the phenomenal work that we put into this event, as though we could just pull it out of the hat just for them at any other time, as though it happened by magic. We don't want to do this work again, we are exhausted. You do the work if you want things to happen, we are happy to help you. And amidst this work we were taking a lot of risks in relation to LOCOG and the culture of Olympics protest suppression in Stratford, whilst trying to make something beautiful and free that would encourage people to feel really happy. People, this was a stressful thing to pull off.

But this is what we achieved:
  • We created an afternoon of sheer joy where nobody got arrested and the worst thing that happened is that a couple of mean people came and were mean
  • We produced a public protest in a culture that is doing its best to suppress dissent
  • We developed an experimental model for how people might organise and protest in repressive circumstances
  • We made a protest that articulated some of the complexities of why the Olympics are problematic, and generated dynamic intersections between anti-Olympics protest and fat activism, disability activism, DIY culture, performance, queer stuff, and so on
  • We made beautiful things: the torches, the medals, Egg'n'Spoon, the gym knickers, the colouring-in, the posters and street art, and all the rest of it
  • We made a protest that attracted diverse people, and which was supported by people internationally
  • We produced an event that was free, independent, a lot of fun
  • We imagined something lovely and unlikely, we made it real, we did it collectively, and we totally got away with it

There will be a few more posts, including pictures and maybe some video, before this website becomes an online archive of the event.

I invite people to share their recollections of the day here.

I will be offering the objects that people made for the Fattylympics to an institutional archive sympathetic to the Fattylympics values. It is important that these objects are cared for into the future and made available to people through archives and exhibitions rather than remaining in my private hands. I think they are culturally important artefacts that could be useful to other people, and which form a visual archive of evidence in themselves that challenge the dominant rhetoric surrounding the Olympics.

I am retiring from putting on big events for people. Kay and I and other key organisers have had a good run with The Fat of the Land, the Big Bum Jumble, and the Fattylympics. We have ideas for other kinds of projects that are less stressful and risky, and are happy to support people who want to build on our work, but for now, that's all. Thanks to everyone that has supported us over the years.

Friday, 6 July 2012

It might rain tomorrow...

...but do not worry, we have an indoor space and a plan.

Thursday, 5 July 2012

Getting there on Saturday

The day is nearly upon us, here's a quick reminder of when, where, how, what, why it all takes place.

The Fattylympics
Saturday 7 July 2012
12.00-5pm
FREE!

Grassroots Resource Centre
Memorial Park
Memorial Avenue
West Ham
London
E15 3DB

How to get there

Public transport:

West Ham Station is very close by and is served by the Jubilee, District and Hammersmith and City underground lines. It is also accessible via the DLR and is on the c2c line which goes from Liverpool Street to Shoeburyness.

The 276 and 323 buses stop close by.

Use the Transport for London Journey Planner to help you get there.

Private transport:

There is free parking on the streets by Memorial Park, and behind the Grassroots building. There is level access from the car park to the Grassroots building via a gate. If the gate is shut, call the reception at Grassroots and they will open it for you. The number is 0207 474 6376.

There are secure bike racks, and buggy racks for people with children, right in front of Grassroots.

What to bring

The Fattylympics will go ahead come rain or shine, but you might want to check the forecast. Looks like we'll need brollies and sunscreen.

Refreshments will be available to buy, you're also welcome to bring your own but please take your litter home with you.

Got kids? There are a couple of lovely play parks close to the venue.

Got a bad attitude? Leave it at home please.

Got last-minute questions? Send them to beefergrrl@hotmail.com


View Larger Map

Stalls

We have some delightful treats in the stalls area at the Fattylympics, including:

These fine people will be representin' too:

Clancey's – cakes and sweet treats
Fatty Unbound – handmade clothes, zines and an alteration station
Feminist Library – books and tote bags
HAES UK – Health At Every Size
Never Diet Again – Consultation
Nithria London – handmade crafts, crochet, jewellery
Red Bows Boutique – women's vintage sizes 14-30

Stop press: there will also be a giant, glittery Egg'n'Spoon for you to stick your head through and have your picture taken!

Wednesday, 4 July 2012

Egg'n'Spoon - colour 'em in and dress 'em up

Look what Becky made! Egg'n'Spoon to colour in and dress up. Sheets will be available on the day, or simply download and print your own.

Tuesday, 3 July 2012

Fattylympics Programme

The official Fattylympics programme is here, designed by Bill.

Download and print it, or pick up a copy on the day. Woo-hoo!

Fattylympics Programme (.pdf, 914kb)

This is where we're gonna be!

Here's Kay and me getting excited about 7 July.

video

Fattylympics Street Art

Remember the beautiful street art that Pivo designed? Here's more.


Pivo Fattylympics street art - cute pair (.pdf, 273kb)

Download, print and share them where you think they need to be shared. One Fattylympian printed them onto A4 sticker sheets (about a tenner for 100 from Staples), just so you know. The .pdf is A3 but can be scaled down to whatever size you choose.

Saturday, 30 June 2012

Look!


Thanks A for the Fattylympics bunting.

Our Guest of Honour Speaks!

Erkan Mustafa, actor and dude of East London, is the Fattylympics' esteemed Guest of Honour. Erkan, who starred as iconic fat kid Roland on TV's Grange Hill, will be cutting the ribbon and participating in the inaugural event, Rolling With Roland. Right on! Here's a little interview with the big guy.

How come you're supporting the Fattylympics?

I am supporting the Fattylympics because as a fat person I feel that this is the only Olympics that wants me to be a part of things. We know that sports people spend years in training to be the best at what they do. It has taken me years to be this fat and I want to celebrate it with like-minded people.

A big part of the way that the Olympics is playing out in East London is in hectoring kids to be more sporty. I think this is a bit of a nightmare for kids who aren't sporty, including the fat ones. What do you think?

I feel that too much is put on children to be sporty, a lot of kids hate sports and it really is hard for fat children to be accepted in sports. It would be nice if children would be allowed to be who they are, not what people want them to be. Growing up in East London, if you were not playing football or cricket it was seen that there was something wrong with you. I played my own sport, donut eating, which I excelled in. Maybe I should put this forward as an event for 2020 games.

It was pretty incredible having a character like Roland on TV every week, seeing some of my experience as a young fat person reflected in him. I think your work as Roland gave me a lot of confidence as a fatty out there, doing things in the world. Thanks for that. I imagine you hear this kind of thing from time to time, how does it affect you?

Over the years many people have came up to me a thank me for playing Roland as they feel he was the only character that they could relate to when they were growing up. Roland started off a shy lonely fat child who was bullied for being different, nothing has changed over the years since I was on TV children still are bullied for being different. As the years went on Roland was liked for just being him. He even excelled in playing basketball, which I loved. I feel that there is not a similar character on TV today that fat children can relate to.

What are your tips for surviving being an extremely famous child actor?

I have been asked many times how I survive being a famous child. I always reply "I haven't" then walk off.

We've heard that you're partial to a bit of carrot cake, how true is that?

There is a rumor going round that I love carrot cake, well the truth of the matter is that I just can't get enough of them just that I can't make it so I beg borrow and steal them as much as I can.

Yay! Catch Erkan on 7 July and, if you're a person of a certain age, don't forget to thank him for his excellent portrayal of Roland. Bonus points if you can bring him a carrot cake (banana bread also acceptable).

Egg'n'Spoons

You just can't be sad when you see a picture like this. Catch more Egg'n'Spoons on the day - woo hoo!

Thursday, 28 June 2012

Meet the Fattylympians: The Fat Geography Massive

Here's Bethan and Rachel, who have really got into the spirit of things!

Who are you?
We are The Fat Geography Massive, also known as Rachel and Bethan.

What does the Fattylympics mean to you?
A celebration of fabulous fat bodies that move, think, speak, love, have fun. An opportunity to collectively make fat bodies present in public space. A chance to disrupt the policing of bodies and the elitism which surrounds the you know whats and sport more generally. And the chance to have fun.

What's the best thing you can do with your body?
Bethan: Give someone a hug
Rachel: Touch another body and give life to another body

Who would you most like to invite to the Fattylympics, and why?
Some of the obesogenic-bunch; geographers whose research ignores fat bodies and does not consider them to be fleshy, moving, thinking, feeling bodies with rights.

Egg or Spoon?
Bethan: Spoon because it is a nicer word to say. Spooooooonnnn
Rachel: Egg because I loved boiled eggs

What else would you like to say?
Were gym knickers the most hated item in your school uniform? Do you wonder to this day why schools think it's a good idea to make girls run around in special uncomfortable, sweaty underwear? If so, then this event is for you. We are organising a stall at the Fattylympics where you can customise gym knickers! If you still have yours bring them along, or dip into our gym knicker bag and grab a pair. Subsequent wearing is optional.

Are you a Fattylympian? Wanna be featured here? Get in touch: beefergrrl@hotmail.com

The Fattylympics Torches

Behold! Fattylympics Torches!

They come courtesy of the accomplished, talented, generous, sublime artist Catharyne Ward. They could not be any more beautiful or have more resonance. Here's what she says:

"I have in essence a pair of hand-held standards with the bases made from caste glass: a woman's hand holding a vessel or torch, painted inside with enamels. The pierced brass erect baton, sitting in its cushion of 'cream' was made from a material sourced to replicate the Olympic torch. The injected foam taking on its own rampant life to squeeze and project its way through the multitude of holes.

The larger, standard-bearing piece, is made from brass plates. These I use a lot in my work, mostly with Eric Wright (he got this one soldered). Using this material over the pierced brass represented something that had a history: this was from some old boot-fair or other; it had probably hung in a pub's public bar previously; it had seen some acts of lunacy; and it's got people depicted eating, drinking and misbehaving. So it's about community, it's about what we've lost in the East End. It's got a big ol' head of foam thats like from a massive keg of beer or a huge plume of smoke - your choice! It's handle is a cast metal piece in a Roman Empire style, that came off my mighty two-bar electric fire which I worshipped religiously 20 years back. It was evidently waiting this long for its perfect entrance into public life."


Friday, 22 June 2012

Meet the Fattylympian: Isha

Say hi to Isha!

Who are you?
My name is Isha (pronounced eye-sha), and dabble in a few creative things: writing, photography, making bags and blogging.

What does the Fattylympics mean to you?
It'll be my first time coming to this event, and look forward to meeting some amazing people who actually look like me! I'm looking forward to making like-minded friends in an environment where I won't be made to feel like an outcast. It's a level of acceptance that us plus size folks rarely get.

What's the best thing you can do with your body?
Compliment it with clothes that make you happy. If that means wearing a pencil skirt, then wear it, regardless of the amount of looks you may get for squeezing your hips into it! I personally LOVE wearing pencil skirts. Also, try things that take you out of your comfort zone- colour and pattens can be incredibly flattering- if you never try, you'll never know.

Who would you most like to invite to the Fattylympics, and why?
This is going to sound incredibly soppy, but I'd like to invite anyone who wakes up everyday and avoids looking in the mirror because of how they look (Charlotte: this might be the point to start singing the Fattylympics Anthem!). I want them to know that they are not alone and that there is a growing community that is there to give loving support and encouragement. I want anyone who attends to feel proud of their bodies, proud of their curves/flab/stretch-marks/non-commercial beauty, and realise that true beauty comes from loving yourself and realising that those that don't accept you, don't matter (I know it's a constant struggle).

Egg or Spoon? 
Egg surely?!An egg's hips don't lie ;p

What else would you like to say?
Er, shameless plug, but I have a blog : / I've only just started it actually, so it's baby steps thus far, but you can also see a small selection of the jewellery and bags that me and my partner in crime make: creativetypefashion.blogspot.co.uk

Are you a Fattylympian? Wanna be featured here? Get in touch: beefergrrl@hotmail.com

Tuesday, 12 June 2012

Saturday, 9 June 2012

Fattylympics after party!

Details have just been announced for Unskinny Bop's Prom, which also happens on 7 July, just after the Fattylympics, and will be a fantastic after party for anyone with energy to burn after rolling, twirling, spitting and the like.

Fattylympians can snag super-cheap £5 tickets on the night or in advance but you will need to give a magic password to Tim at the door (which is not 'fattylympics' ha ha) and you can only get the password if you come to the Fattylympics.

Friday, 8 June 2012

Erkan Mustafa aka Roland Browning of TV's Grange Hill will open the Fattylympics

The Fattylympics is extremely happy to announce that our esteemed guest of honour, responsible for opening the event, will be Erkan Mustafa.

Erkan is a long-time resident of East London and will be known to many as the actor who portrayed the most iconic fat kid in the history of British TV: Roland Browning from Grange Hill.

Younger Fattylympians might want to bone up on the world of Roland, a character who is put upon, but ultimately grows in confidence and badassery – whilst remaining fat. That would never happen today.

Here he is on his first day at school:



We welcome Erkan and thank him for his work. Erkan will be cutting the ribbon and hosting the first Fattylympics event: Rolling with Roland. He has generously offered his services for free, but tells us that he does like a carrot cake (and banana bread too). If you would like to show your gratitude in the form of baked goods for Erkan, please get in touch.

Find out more about Erkan's portrayal of Roland in this Grange Hill Gold interview.

Thursday, 7 June 2012

Reflecting on the Fattylympics Anthem

I'm so excited by the Anthem, I wrote a little post for Obesity Timebomb where I think about it a bit more.

Meet the Fattylympian: Verity

Verity volunteered to write the Fattylympics Anthem and she did a fantastic job. Take a look and have a listen. Here's a bit more about her and about it...

Please introduce yourself

My name's Verity Susman. I play in Electrelane and I've got a solo project now: http://www.facebook.com/veritysusman

Why did you volunteer to write the Fattylympics Anthem?

I wanted to have a go at writing an anthem for an important event, and of all the events happening in London this summer, the Fattylympics seems the most important.

Could you talk a bit about the process of writing it?

At first I thought about anthems and hymns I really like, then got a bit depressed thinking I can never write anything like that, but it was useful in terms of thinking about the structure of these type of songs.

After Charlotte sent me the lyrics I kept them going round in my head and when I started singing a suitable melody to myself I recorded it on dictophone. I went back to it later and worked out a chord structure to go with it.

The recording is the demo I sent to Charlotte - it's just using the keyboard I had to hand at the time (and a keyboard guitar sound - keytar! - because my real guitar got broken on a recent trip). It's just a demo because the hope was that people would learn it and sing it at the Fattylympics, which is the main thing.

I realised later on that there are lots of references to dreaming in the lyrics, what is your dream for the Fattylympics Anthem?

For 20,000 people to sing it standing in a field...or even 20 would do.

What else would you like to say?

I'm gutted I can't be there on the day - can someone make a film of the Fattylympics? (Charlotte's answer: yes!)

The Fattylympics Anthem!

If you're going to have a Fattylympics, and if you're going to have an Opening Ceremony, you need an anthem to go with it. Fattylympians, we have not let you down. It gives me enormous pleasure to share the official Fattylympics Anthem.

Please have a listen to it, familiarise yourselves with the words and the tune. Sing it loud and proud, or hum it quietly (substitute 'fudge' for the swearword if you need to). We will be singing the Anthem on the day, hopefully with you.

Listen to the Fattylympics Anthem, played and sung by Verity in super hi-fi (.wav 25mb) or slightly more lo-fi (.mp3 3.3mb)

The Fattylympics Anthem 2012
Words by Charlotte Cooper, music by Verity Susman

When you're looking in the mirror and you don't like what you see
Try to dream of social justice
Try to dream of being free

Trapped in the shadow of a corporate beast
You don't have to fuck people over to survive

You can try a different way
Maybe today we'll learn a new way to be alive

(shouting)
Let's try to dream it together
Let's dream it together today

It won't be perfect because things never are
But when times are hard we'll remember messing around in the park

Doo doo doo doo doo doo...

Verity and I have released the Fattylympics Anthem under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported Licence. This means that, as long as you credit us and your work is non-commercial, you are free to share this song and remix it as long as you share your remixes.

Fattylympics Anthem chords in F Major (.txt, 10k)
Fattylympics Anthem chords in Eb Major (in case you want to sing it in a lower register) (.txt, 10k)

Creative Commons Licence
The Fattylympics Anthem by Charlotte Cooper and Verity Susman is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License.
Based on a work at fattylympics.blogspot.co.uk.
Permissions beyond the scope of this license may be available at http://fattylympics.blogspot.co.uk/.

Monday, 4 June 2012

Fatty Unbound at the Fattylympics

The Fattylympics is really happy to announce that Kirsty Lou of the wonderful Fatty Unbound blog will be hosting a stall at the Fattylympics, selling her beautiful hand-made clothing.

There are still some stalls available, drop us a line if you want one. Here's some more information about stalls.

Fattylympics Events: Twirling

This is what we'll be doing on the day.

Twirling
Proposed by Cheap and Porky

Cheap and Porky will perform a choreographed ribbon gymnastic routine to a piece of music lasting three minutes and four seconds for the delight of the Fattylympics attendees.

After this, the pair will open the floor to some freestyle ribbon action for all to enjoy.

Cheap and Porky will provide ribbons for those inspired to join in. Should you wish to start practicing throwing your own shapes, the freestyle music will be 'Loving You’s a Dirty Job’ performed by Bonnie Tyler and Todd Rundgren, weighing in at a hefty seven minutes, forty-sex seconds.

Fattylympics Events: Spitting on the BMI

This is what we'll be doing on the day

Spitting on the BMI
Proposed by Charlotte

BMI stands for Body Mass Index. It is a sum that enables you to sort of work out how much space someone's body takes up in the world, but it tells you nothing about people's health behaviours. It reduces the wild complexity of how people experience and live in their bodies to a number. Only a few numbers are good numbers. The BMI chart originated in the insurance industry and is now a standard tool in health and weight loss industries for berating people of all sizes.

In the Fattylympics event 'Spitting on the BMI' everyone will be encouraged to spit on a lovely big 'scientific' copy of the BMI chart.

We acknowledge that spitting is not very nice, and we will make sure that the spitting takes place in an area where it will not upset other people in the park. We will be looking for people who spit with style and gusto. At the end of the event, handlers in rubber gloves will carefully place the spitty BMI chart in a bin bag and dispose of it. Spitters and onlookers will be encouraged to think of the spitty BMI chart every time they are coerced onto a set of scales, or subjected to inescapable diet talk.

Fattylympics Events: Rolling with Roland

This is what we will be doing on the day

Rolling with Roland
Proposed by Kay

Our guest of honour, Erkan Mustafa, also known as the actor who portrayed iconic TV fat kid Roland Browning, will get the event underway.

In Rolling with Roland, participants will make their way up the gently landscaped roof of Grassroots and roll downwards. We will check the ground beforehand for poo and litter, and it will be removed and the ground neutralised and made nice. There may or may not be different rounds for extravagant rolling, slow rolling, backwards rolling and freestyle rolling.

That's it.
This is where we'll be rolling

Fattylympics Events: Spin-Off

Following fierce competition, we are delighted to announce the events that got through the proposal round for the Fattylympics. Yes folks, this is what we'll be doing on the day.

Spin Off
Proposed by Simon

This event concerns the rotation of the body by any available means (feet, wheels etc), to provoke a measurable range of dizzy states and an awareness of their effects.

Participants will wear specially-constructed Spinning Hats and will spin to the beat of a metronome in three rounds, getting faster each time. Much cheering and yells of "Faster! Faster!" are encouraged.


Upon completion of the spin a Dizz-o-Meter will be produced, upon which participants will measure the depth of their dizziness.


A quiet place to sit down, and a bucket in case of 'upsets' will be provided for participants.

Meet the Fattylympian: Lauren

Here's Lauren in the super-fab Vol.Up.2 mag
by Velvet d'Amour
Who are you?
I am Lauren, a 28 year old unemployed bum from Essex.

What does the Fattylympics mean to you?
It means fun, community and a place where I can feel safe and comfortable from ridicule - a welcome respite in this Olympian, 200,000 Drs against obesity, Biggest Loser culture I find myself in.

What's the best thing you can do with your body?
I've never been someone who can do party tricks, I'm not double-jointed anywhere which has always made me quite sad. But I suppose as a living, breathing thing, that my body can keep me alive and allow me to go out into the world is a great thing.

Who would you most like to invite to the Fattylympics, and why?
My initial response was someone notoriously fat hating, like Jamie Oliver, or Dr Christian - but why should they be invited to an event that they will only sneer at? I would like to invite all the wonderful fatties who would feel better about themselves and life by attending Fattylympics.

Egg or Spoon?
Spoon! I don't like eggs, unless they're a) chocolate or b) in chocolate cake

What else would you like to say?
I have a blog that talks about fatty fashion, Pocket Rocket (www.pocketrocketfashion.com). It's frivolous but fun (I hope!) and really just that I'm so excited for the event, I can't wait!

Are you a Fattylympian? Wanna be featured here? Get in touch: beefergrrl@hotmail.com

Warm-up with some Chub-Robics!

The Fattylympics will get underway on Saturday 7 July with stalls, performances and general hanging-out. Keep your eyes peeled for this:

Chub-Robics!

Join Vivacious von Vixen (pictured, left) in a vitalising warm-up for the Fattylympics opening ceremony!

With tongue planted firmly in cheek, Vivacious will lead an exercise routine like no other to get you pumped and limber for the day’s delights.

Stretch that satirical smirk and push your funny bone to the limit with moves carefully designed to flaunt the flab, laud your lard and applaud the ample-bodied.

Vivacious will provide just the exuberant encouragement you need and have you shedding your inhibitions and building body-positivity from the very first session. Including a range of accessible moves to accommodate all abilities, this pork-out will have even the sveltest of spectators shakin' and groovin'. Whether well-upholstered or blessed with the most petite of paunches, these moves will flatter any figure and praise physiques of all proportions.

Guaranteed to expand your sense of humour by at least two dress sizes.*

Join us around midday on 7 July to start working your wobble and realise your portly potential!

*Hyperbolic claims only verified when taken in combination with a pinch of salt.